Co-Parenting After Separation And Divorce
Parenting with an ex can be tricky business, but it is possible.
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It can be hard to know how to help your kids adjust to family changes.
Each family is unique and it’s important to seek out tailored support for your personal circumstances.
Depending on your personal situation, try to talk to them in a way that lets them know these key messages:
Finding the right words to help your kids understand the changes can feel hard at first. Here are some tips that might make it a bit easier:
While it is important to be honest, keeping in mind the age and emotional level of your child is important when deciding how much to share
Be prepared to listen to your child’s concerns and talk about their worries - it’s ok if you don’t have all the answers right away
Find a positive way to discuss the decision to split - eg. "we’ve decided we’ll both be happier if we separate"
Plan a time where everyone can be together and choose a place with few distractions or interruptions
After talking as a family, follow up with each child individually to make sure they understand and have the chance to ask questions
You might decide to talk to your kids while doing something together as this can ease the tension (a long car trip/walking the dog)
Aim to create a conflict free space so that your kids feel comfortable to share how they feel
Although a relationship is ending, presenting a unified front to your kids helps them feel safe and secure during these changes. Being ‘partners in parenting’ means:
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